Does the moon get lonely?

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Traveling alone is one of the greatest experiences I’ve ever had the opportunity to do. Over 25k miles across the United States in the past year…  through the backroads and big cities to see the most beautiful sunrises and sunsets from lighthouses, beaches, colorful waters, the highest mountains, and everywhere in between.


It is rare when I miss my goal of having an intentional conversation with a stranger. I pass out a few business cards every day too. I’m often surrounded by masses of people.
Yet, one thing drifts into my life many nights.


Loneliness.


Often it is comforted by the aloneness I feel from the inside. I am very lucky to have a solid and positive relationship with myself.
There are however, a few times here and there, when loneliness strikes hard.
It does make sense, I don’t really fit in anywhere with many people. I live an adventurous life but I don’t follow many cultural norms.

I often feel very boring and left out…
I don’t drink or smoke.
I rarely eat out as I still struggle with my relationship with food.
I don’t have a partner to call or friends who can come along. 


I spend my days listening to the stories of the people I meet along the way, knowing the relationship will end soon and I will be back to my own little world without much of a fanfare.


I have spent the last month without physically seeing anyone that I know. 30 days without real contact with a friend or family member. I spend 20+ hours everyday alone with only the thoughts in my head, feelings in my heart, and the feet that carry me along the way…


Tonight, as I wandered off on an Adventure, I’m sitting here watching the full moon rise over the Atlantic Ocean… no stars… no clouds… just a brisk wind carry the sound of the waves across my heart while I sit here and wonder…


Do you think the moon gets lonely?


My personal experiment of 30 days is nothing compared to what many people have had to go through the past year… a year of being forced to be alone without energetic contact, or physical touch, or emotional connection with someone close.
As the next step unfolds and the beginning of the aftershock begins to hit, I can’t help but wonder what the lasting effects are going to be of the massive isolation movement hidden behind masks and fear and reintegration into the future of society.
What I see on the road is much different than what I see on social media and the news. I wish I could say one is better or right or more predictable… but I can’t.


What I do know is that there is going to be some difficulties ahead.


All humans want love and attention communicated in a way they understand. People want to be seen, heard, and affirmed.
Here is a simple formula to give positive attention to anyone so we can work to improve the positive energy and reduce the destructive behaviors that follow when people begin to seek validation l through unhealthy means.


3 steps to Positive Attention


Seen

1. Focused Attention: Give the person you’re with your full attention.

Heard

2. Listen to Understand: Become passionately curious about them and what they’re saying (and what they’re not saying) without judgment and ridicule.

Affirmed

3. Leave a Profit: People don’t always need a response or guidance, they just need/want to verbally process what is in their head. Keep your ears open and mouth shut… it will go a long way to healing and providing a positive step in a better direction.


I encourage you to reach out to a friend or family member. Maybe you need an ear or maybe they need an smile.


Share some positivity today.

Give some kindness today.

Fill your heart with Joy today.


And no matter how lonely you are, remember the moon shines it’s brightest all alone.

Consistent Daily Discipline

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“Work harder on yourself than you do on your job.” Jim Rohn

If there is one idea that separates winning from losing, it is the discipline of daily personal development. I spend several hours a week improving myself mentally. Reading books and articles, listening to speakers, presentations, podcasts and anything else I can get my hands on. Over the past 12 years I have learned the importance of self-education and personal responsibility. Although I may not be successful (depends on who’s judging), I know a thing or two about being young and getting what I want. I’m here to share a few things I started in my 20’s and I hope you find value in the ideas below. I know how valuable your time is.

Goals- If you don’t know where you’re going, you’ll never arrive. Know your vision and take consistent and massive action toward your goals. Personally, I’m a dreamer. I’m willing to go for failure and I don’t worry about how hard it is going to be or how long it is going to take. A goal is never too big if I’m focused and willing to take the action needed to accomplish it. Once I set a goal, I reduce it to writing and put it on my vision board. I read it 5+ times a day as though I have already accomplished it. I become so focused on my goal(s) that I can’t sleep because I want to wake up and start taking action toward it. If you aren’t working toward your goals, you’ll be working toward someone else’s goals.

Wake up early- I don’t know about you, but in college, I never took a class before 11am. I stayed up late and I didn’t make it to most of my afternoon classes either. I was never stressed and had plenty of time to do what I wanted. As I have grown up and started a family, I have learned how important alone time is. I now make it a priority to wake up and get started while the rest of the world is sleeping. Most days, I have my personal development, exercise, my “hour of power”, goal setting/review, breakfast and a cup of coffee done before 7. If you struggle with “I don’t have time” consider waking up early. I’ve studied many millionaires, billionaires and highly successful people and most of them wake up early and start working on their goals and dreams. If waking up early is good enough for them it’s good enough for me.

Be coachable- I have found more people willing to help me because I have an open mind, work ethic, my willingness to try something new and my love for learning. Not all knowledge is useful, and you may not find value in everything you try. I can tell you from experience though, I’ve learned more from failure and how not to do something than I have from succeeding. The best part about being coachable, you can find someone who has been through the school of hard knocks and they can save you time and energy if you will just listen and discuss. I’ve been told one of life’s greatest pleasures is mentoring someone who is willing to be mentored. I’ve attracted some pretty awesome mentors up to this point!

Be self-confident- Yes, you may be young, but does that mean you aren’t a professional? NO! This has been one of the most difficult business tasks I’ve had to overcome. I see myself as young and assumed more prominent people looked at me the same way. I had a fear of calling on someone with a prominent title… The more and more I have interacted with older professionals, the more I have learned they are normal people. Don’t let your age or lack of a title get in your way from making a contact that could spring board your future! If you don’t believe in yourself, don’t expect anyone else to either.

Be a professional and become an expert in your field- Yes a first impression is important, but give me 5 minutes with someone and I will show why we should do business together.  Let me demonstrate my knowledge and expertise and not only will earn their business, they will come back again and bring their friends. You can act your age or you can become a professional. Just remember, they pay accordingly.

Take full responsibility- This is life changing if you’ll take it serious. You can’t expect someone else to take care of you. Whether you’re 18, 20, 25, 30 or older, it is time to grow up and take responsibility for your future. If you don’t take full responsibility for your future, someone else will. And guess what they have planned for you? Not much. If you are willing to work hard, be coachable and always be learning, you will not only find more opportunities, but you will create opportunities.

Start the process with a little self-evaluation. Be honest and open with yourself. What are your strengths? What are your weaknesses? Pick one area and start working on it right now! YOU are the only person who can change your thoughts and actions. I promise, make the decision to work on yourself every day and you open a door to endless possibilities!

If you don’t learn to discipline yourself, the universe will discipline you according to your thoughts, actions, and emotions. What you do today effects ALL of your tomorrows…

What ACTION! will you take today!?