Colorful Detours

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Detours often lead to unexpected Adventures.


It’s been a while, mostly an intentional break to make sure I was focusing my attention in the proper places. I’ve been debating much within and searching for some understanding from the outside world. I have no more understanding and have yet to find what I’m looking for… I am however finding some peace in the unknowns.


A few weeks has passed since my least favorite day of the year and I found myself a little bit older and not so much wiser and with even less real direction than a year ago.


The oddity of the situation is I have found more peace in the uncertainty than I have had in years past. Most everything I have been before is gone. Most everything I thought I was working toward has disintegrated leaving me with another pile of ashes… once again hoping for a beautiful Phoenix to rise once again.


I believe, with some scientific evidence and with the helpful reflections from many people I have worked with over the years, that we tend to physically manifest that which we emotionally feel.


If we are Joyful, our body exudes energy.
If we are lonely, we often feel empty.
If we are hurt, we often want to feel physical pain.


For a bit of time, I have felt lost. Much of which is living in a body I still don’t understand. I continue to sit in a mind that fascinates me, yet I lack the understanding around It’s full functionality. The life I have is full of much Joy and Energy due to my mindset and activities, yet I still find peace in the solitude of being completely lost with not much more than the horizon to guide my way.


To bring these concepts full circle, I have been feeling lost with a massive storm building inside. As I left my previous destination with a path unknown, I chased a brutal storm racing across the western plains hoping to stand in it’s path so I could feel the cleansing wrath of the wind and water.


I raced it through the deepest forests and down the backroads across the plains never able to catch up. As I became disappointed I was going to miss my chance to be met with the reminisce of my journey, I looked up just above the cows to find the Joyful gift I was missing.


I am in a place I have never been and would never have followed a map to arrive to and I have been gifted with the most full rainbow I’ve ever seen. The colors of the sky mixed with the reflection of the sun setting over the far off horizon has mixed itself into a beautiful energy gifting suprise.


As I immediately stopped chasing the darkness, I was given a fresh view of beautiful light sitting in the great big sky. I took the time to reflect in my moment as I gazed at the natural wonders we often miss passing through our lives ignoring much of what sets our heart free.


If I had a gift I could give directly to you, it would be a detour away from a challenge or adversity you are facing today, this week, this month, this year…


I would not give you the detour to take away from your journey, but to add some life giving energy to rebuild your strength and fortitude to head back into your challenge fully equipped with the stimulation and confidence you need to stand up once again and keep moving forward with your best next step toward your future.


Take an awkward step.

Take a detour.

Take a wrong turn.


Whatever you do….


Just take the step and don’t stop until you get where you want to go.


The difference between a cow and Buffalo is cows run away from the storm and Buffalo run through the storm…


Run like a MF Buffalo.

Joy is my Home

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Please let me introduce the man who taught me about Unlimited Energy and Joy.


There have been some highs and lows over the past couple years. They used to come so quickly and go so swiftly a therapist was trying to medicate me into oblivion because she swore I was bipolar.


It took about 4-6 weeks after I stopped drinking to begin to understand how to reduce my anxiety and overcome my depression from the identity tension I worked to release.


A year of relentlessly studying the mind gave me a new perspective on how we function through mental health struggles. I was enjoying my studies so I added more people and self education and began to explore new ideas and expand my personal philosophy on change.


Toward the end of summer in 2019, I found myself without the comfort of a home and living in the backseat of my tiny GEO Prism parked behind a Walmart in Denver.


The first day I woke up there, I thought I would be full of disappointment and shame. I got a little more than I expected…


I work up and watched the sunrise over the eastern plains snuggled up in my sleeping back pouring my tears of Joy onto the pages of my journal, also asking myself how the hell I was going to overcome the challenges I was presented with.


As if from nowhere, I was introduced to the man I needed more than anyone else in the world. He stands just over six feet tall and has a smile as energetic as the Sun.


He too had been through many hardships and we shared a mutual life situation. This man fascinates me. Still to this day, no matter how difficult his struggles, he finds a way to step back, see the situation from a different perspective, and stimulates a solid mix of intelligence and creativity to overcome challenges and walk through adversities… all while keeping his head up and smile faced forward.


“Hope is the ability to profit from and setback. By becoming more than you are, you can overcome more than you did yesterday.”


Joy.


Joy is the number one lesson I have learned from him.


I have seen him homeless and hungry. I just sit back watch him be alone and lonely. The most incredible impact he has made on me is to use his situation to his advantage. There seems to be nothing he fears and I done know if risk even registers in his mind.
You should see him…


The way he works while no one is watching.

•Reading

•Writing

•Speaking

The way he projects attention.

•Focus

•Listening

•Communicating


The way he processes life.

•Intelligence

•Creativity

•Simplicity


I have seen him lose everything, multiple times, and stand right back up to face the exact challenge that beat him down… and win.


I have seen him walk up to strangers on the street and in their office and pass right through into the deepest part of their soul to give them everything that cannot buy.


I sit in awe of how he swiftly moves without effort, speaks with force yet care, and he has yet to prove to me there is nothing he won’t try at least once.


To see how people pick him off the street and the kindness he gives them.


To watch him give his attention so freely to those who need it more than he does.


I am amazed at how he takes a hard day and washes it away with some kind words to himself and a quick rest on his pillow before he wakes up and does it all over again with a smile.


I have asked him many times how he does it.


What drives you to keep giving to everyone you meet?

Why do you give away all your kindness?

When do you take time for yourself?

Who do you go to for support and encouragement?

How do you have unlimited energy?

Where can I learn to be full of Joy?


As he always does, he simplified everything to a few gentle steps forward.


Fresh air is the best care and self care is needed care. If your Emotional Battery is empty, you cannot give to others. It is just as important to keep your Mindset Positive through forced repetition of Gratitude. Lastly, treat your body as if it were the most important mechanical tool on the planet for it will help you or hinder you in the direction of your goals.


Here are the 3 categories with 6 steps to create Unlimited Energy from WITHIN.


Mind- To overcome challenges, you must learn to balance each side of your mind to reduce anxiety and increase motivation.

•Intellectual Stimulation

•Creative Expression

Body- Motion is the key to life as nothing is in the same place it was a second ago and will only be here in the current moment. If you don’t choose where you’re going, you’ll simply go where you are put.

•Physical Exertion

•Feeling of Progress

Soul- The energy of the Universe needs no explanation, yet without acceptance of it’s existence, you will fight a ghost as powerful and invisible as gravity.


•Emotional Connection

•Spiritual Release

As you step forward in your life, it is important to find balance and stimulate growth and discovery in each area. I life to heavy in one area will begin to be overrun with dissatisfaction and disappointment.
Positivity and Negativity cannot occupy a person at the same time. You must learn to choose Joy or Fear will quickly overtake you drifting down the path of misery and failure.


Do not be overwhelmed of the list as you will begin where you are and grow into the person you need and want to become on the journey of life. Be intentional and remain focused and there is no greater force than a man with purposeful action.

Today is the first day of the rest of your life… how will you live today?

Does the moon get lonely?

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Traveling alone is one of the greatest experiences I’ve ever had the opportunity to do. Over 25k miles across the United States in the past year…  through the backroads and big cities to see the most beautiful sunrises and sunsets from lighthouses, beaches, colorful waters, the highest mountains, and everywhere in between.


It is rare when I miss my goal of having an intentional conversation with a stranger. I pass out a few business cards every day too. I’m often surrounded by masses of people.
Yet, one thing drifts into my life many nights.


Loneliness.


Often it is comforted by the aloneness I feel from the inside. I am very lucky to have a solid and positive relationship with myself.
There are however, a few times here and there, when loneliness strikes hard.
It does make sense, I don’t really fit in anywhere with many people. I live an adventurous life but I don’t follow many cultural norms.

I often feel very boring and left out…
I don’t drink or smoke.
I rarely eat out as I still struggle with my relationship with food.
I don’t have a partner to call or friends who can come along. 


I spend my days listening to the stories of the people I meet along the way, knowing the relationship will end soon and I will be back to my own little world without much of a fanfare.


I have spent the last month without physically seeing anyone that I know. 30 days without real contact with a friend or family member. I spend 20+ hours everyday alone with only the thoughts in my head, feelings in my heart, and the feet that carry me along the way…


Tonight, as I wandered off on an Adventure, I’m sitting here watching the full moon rise over the Atlantic Ocean… no stars… no clouds… just a brisk wind carry the sound of the waves across my heart while I sit here and wonder…


Do you think the moon gets lonely?


My personal experiment of 30 days is nothing compared to what many people have had to go through the past year… a year of being forced to be alone without energetic contact, or physical touch, or emotional connection with someone close.
As the next step unfolds and the beginning of the aftershock begins to hit, I can’t help but wonder what the lasting effects are going to be of the massive isolation movement hidden behind masks and fear and reintegration into the future of society.
What I see on the road is much different than what I see on social media and the news. I wish I could say one is better or right or more predictable… but I can’t.


What I do know is that there is going to be some difficulties ahead.


All humans want love and attention communicated in a way they understand. People want to be seen, heard, and affirmed.
Here is a simple formula to give positive attention to anyone so we can work to improve the positive energy and reduce the destructive behaviors that follow when people begin to seek validation l through unhealthy means.


3 steps to Positive Attention


Seen

1. Focused Attention: Give the person you’re with your full attention.

Heard

2. Listen to Understand: Become passionately curious about them and what they’re saying (and what they’re not saying) without judgment and ridicule.

Affirmed

3. Leave a Profit: People don’t always need a response or guidance, they just need/want to verbally process what is in their head. Keep your ears open and mouth shut… it will go a long way to healing and providing a positive step in a better direction.


I encourage you to reach out to a friend or family member. Maybe you need an ear or maybe they need an smile.


Share some positivity today.

Give some kindness today.

Fill your heart with Joy today.


And no matter how lonely you are, remember the moon shines it’s brightest all alone.

Take the Detour…

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Detours…

We have access to the most precise technology ever imagined. We plan our day, our travel, our everything based on the little device we hold in our had. We know EXACTLY where we are going, what the weather will be, how to get there, and even what the distance and time will be from here to there. We type it in our little device and hit ‘GO’! and we are off to our destination. We don’t even have to think anymore… we just get in the plane, train, or automobile and we let the unknowns and uncertainties brush off our shoulders so we can focus on the more urgent tasks of the day.

But… then…

Have you ever been driving and missed a turn, had to slow down because of construction, or even had to stop for rush hour traffic?

How did that make you feel?

Did you get frustrated or angry?

Where you stressed or anxious?

How did you physically and verbally react the situation?

Have you ever wondered why?…

What creates the reactions you have when you are faced with something that doesn’t fit your “plan”?

Let’s look into this for just a moment.

What is your reaction?

Why do you react this way?

How would you prefer to respond to setbacks and adversities?

Have you ever sat back and thought about how much longer it actually takes when you turn on the wrong road or have to go 5-10 mph under your desired speed?

It is under 5 minutes in most cases. (Yes, I know there are ALWAYS exceptions to the circumstances.)

Is the thought of ‘losing’ 5 minutes worth losing the personal power over your thoughts, feelings, and actions for the rest of the day?

Are you really in that big of a hurry to get where you are going?

Is 5 minutes really going to make of break the rest of your life?

If it is, I have some bold news to pass along to you.

Look in the mirror, it is your fault.

If 5 minutes is going to make or break your entire day, then you have set yourself up with the thoughts, feelings, and actions which have taken you to this point. The insistent need to take care of the urgencies and emergencies you have rather than focusing on the major priorities has led you too exactly where you are.

If 5 minutes is going to make or break you, I would suggest you start with looking at where you are mentally, physically, emotionally so you can align yourself with reality… knowing where you truly are is the best step you can take to moving forward in the BEST possible direction, FOR YOU!

Start where you are… and then you can begin to work to where you want to go.

That sounds harsh Gary…. Thank you for blaming me for all my own problems… but… but… but… it is not my fault…

Yes, I understand how you feel. I felt the same way in my own life until I found out that I am the only person that has power over my thoughts, feelings, and actions. It is up to me to focus my attention on what I can control versus all the things I can’t. Then, I had to learn to listen to myself to understand what I was doing and why I was doing it. Listening to myself without judgment or ridicule allowed me to find the weak spots in my day so I knew where to focus my efforts.

Then, I had to set myself up to be better in the future… Leaving a profit in my own life. Learning to focus my energy on the KNOWNS vs the unknowns and uncertainties allowed me to live in the present. Living in the NOW is truly the only way we can live a JOYFUL and HAPPY life.

Attempting to live in the past creates the suffering of loss and depression.

Attempting to live in the future creates the suffering of worry and anxiety.

Attempting to live in the now releases the tension between the past and the present allowing more of our emotional energy to be used toward more positive thoughts, more desirable behaviors, and creating the best possible environment we can surround ourselves with to thrive.

Living our best life truly comes from being present and living in the NOW.

But Gary, how do we do that?

The best first step is to STOP!

(You are going to meditate for less than 60 seconds. This will be how to create your own “state” of NOW. Learning to STOP and TAKE A BREATH is the way for you to learn to dam the river of negativity and break the cycle of undesirable thoughts and emotions to curb the destructive behaviors that follow.)

The next best step is to close your eyes (if you are in a safe place to do so) take a HUGE BREATH IN and then a HUGE RELIEVEING BREATH OUT.

(Breath in the Sunshine… breath out the Darkness…)

Then ask 3 primary questions:

What am I feeling?

Why am I feeling this way?

How can I take the best first step forward in a more positive direction?

NOW GO!

Take that first step in the new direction! The moment you hesitate, you lost your ‘state’, and you will be heading back down the old path that led you to where you are today. Fear fills the empty space between thought and action. If you hesitate, the negative self-talk monster will show up and begin eating your courage away from you.

Don’t worry about making mistakes or how long it will take or even if you will get all the way to the end…

There is no course map.

There is no pacer.

There is no finish line.

There is no time limit.

There is only the direction of your heart, the focus of your mind, and the step you are in that will lead you everywhere you want to go… or nowhere at all.

Take the wrong turns…

Slowdown in traffic…

Accept the detours…

Live your best life by learning to make the best of today, healing from yesterday, and dreaming about tomorrow knowing by doing the best you can today, all your tomorrows will compound into more than you can ever imagine.

Always cheering for you,

Gary

What’s your best 1st step forward?

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So how do I get started? Here’s my advice for taking the first step toward better fitness and health.

What’s your “WHY”? What do you REALLY want out of this? Do you want to be healthy, lose some weight or look great in a Speedo? Or do you want to have the energy to play with your kids, be more attentive with your spouse and become a better person to be around. My “WHY” was the second set of reasons, not the first. When I felt like giving up, these were the reasons I didn’t grab the second plate of food, I went for the walk, I woke up early and stayed focused even when I didn’t want to. Find your “WHY” and take relentless massive action toward it!

Don’t focus on too much too fast. Pick one or two things and work really hard on them for 30 days. If you are doing really well, add something new. If not, refocus and make sure you put the habits in place that will carry you! I would rather focus on changing the underlying cause of the problem than just the symptoms. When you find a problem, go after the source!

Stick to a schedule. I prefer an “everyday” activity because this is how I built my daily disciplines. I would oversleep and then drive my happy tail across town and sit in my car at the rec center instead of just saying screw it for the day and getting an extra 20 minutes of sleep. I slowly started getting up a little earlier and working out for 10 minutes. I finally got tired of it so I started getting up on time and putting in a full workout. This has been one of the top 3 disciplines I have cemented over the past 3 years. Don’t underestimate that one missed workout. I believe it’s more important to go through the motions than it is to actually workout.

Be Positive, Be Patient, Be Persistent. I’m adding this because it is my mantra. I hate waiting. I want what I want and I want it NOW!!! So I repeat this statement everyday while I drink my coffee. (I seriously had it put on my coffee cup as a reminder) I used to weigh myself 4 times a day. Was it obsessive? Yes. Did it work for me? Yes. I also know people who only weigh themselves once a week. They have had tremendous success with it. As with your whole plan- trial and error & and find out what works best for YOU!!!

Don’t over complicate it. I know it is tempting to read every book, blog and try something new every week when you aren’t seeing instant results. Find a plan and work it every single day. If you screw today up, forget about it. It’s gone. You can’t do anything about it… Don’t dwell on the bad day- move on. Minimize the bad days and maximize the good days. To this day, this is still my focus. If I mess up a day, I move on and get back on track tomorrow. Don’t have two bad days in a row!

With running- run when you can, walk if you have to, but never ever finish early. I couldn’t run a full block when I started. It sucked. It was hard. We worked on it and followed our plan and let time work in our favor. I’m not here to B.S. you- it’s going to be hard. It’s going to take time. Days when you don’t want to get off the couch. Days when you want to eat everything in sight. Days when you just don’t feel like it. There are going to be days when you want to quit. DON’T! It is so worth sticking it out and being uncomfortable. Think of your “WHY” to get you through the hard days.

Whatever you do, however you do it, start TODAY!!! Yesterday is gone and tomorrow is too far away. What you do today (good or bad) effects all of your tomorrows. Start with a piece of paper, write down your “WHY”, make plan, post your plan where you will read it every day and start taking action! Stop waiting and stop overthinking. Just start with what you can do right now. Your future self will thank you!

Are you joining us for Self Care is the Best Care?? Self Care is the Best Care

Slow Down…

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Slow down?

Really Gary? That’s your advice for me?… I thought you were here to help me do more, get more, accomplish more?… What kind of advice is SLOW DOWN?

Slow down…

Just for a few minutes, slow down. Even better, slow down and give yourself some positive focused attention… for just a moment. When you STOP you will find out exactly where you are.

Where is your head going?

Where is your mouth running?

Where is your heart longing?

Where are your feet standing?

Are you aligned and heading in the same direction of productivity?… or are you moving 100 different directions which takes you into a circle and spiral of busy?

So often we are ‘busy’ because it “feels” good rather than ‘productive’ because it “feels” slow… yet what ‘feels’ good now is probably going to hurt later and what is uncomfortable now is more likely to provide more Joy in the future.

I ask you once again to slow down and even STOP for just a moment. Let your head, mouth, heart, and feet realign so you can take the best step forward in the NOW rather than continuing the spiraling effect of busy always running to the next urgency or emergency rather than taking a moment to organize your priorities that will move you forward in the best way for YOU.

If you are looking for a Jump Start, Kick Start, or Fresh Start and want a little guidance and community please check out the upcoming events and sign up today. Some are free and some are a small fee.

Self Care is the Best Care

I challenge you to 100 days of Growth!

See you soon!

Repeat. Repeat. Repeat…

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Anything worth doing is worth repeating over and over and over again until it becomes a part of you.

There are 4 primary steps to modifying your mindset toward a new goal or destination.

  • Awareness
  • Clarity
  • Prioritize
  • Focus

This is all before the intended action even begins moving forward.

I often hear how difficult it is to start a new habit. Many times I see how a person drifts from their focus while habitually falling back into the actions they have followed for years and decades. The frustration and overwhelm of having to repeat a thought, an action, a situation over and over and over again with the temporary feelings of disgust.

The rules of the game are set by a force much greater than us. The universe has some basic laws she follows, and it is not in our ability to change the rules. The idea of fighting the rules and working against the natural laws is exhausting and a game we will never win… so why not just learn the rules and do your best to become effective and efficient within the confinements of the reality we live in?

Do you “KNOW” or do you continue to get a “NO”?

  • K stands for Knowledge
  • N stands for Negative
  • O stands for Opposing
  • W stands for Wisdom

Understanding and Acceptance of the Natural Laws turns ‘NO’ into ‘YES’!

Knowledge x Understanding x Acceptance = Wisdom

Without Knowledge or Understanding or Acceptance there can be no Wisdom.

Anything multiplied by a negative receives a negative outcome…

(+ x + x – = -)

Any positives multiplied by any positives receives a positive outcome…

(+ x + x + = +)

What does this have to do with Personal Development?

Everything…

The basic Laws of the Universe give us the tools to improve our life, if we are just willing to open our mind… if we listen to understand… understand to accept the great laws rather than working against the exact force which is designed to help us grow forward.

Time moves forward, at the same speed, every single day, for as long as history has been recorded in written form.

The earth rotates the same direction, at the same speed, every single day, for as long as history has been recorded in written form.

The seasons come and the seasons go, in the same order, at the same consistency, for as long as history has been recorded in written form.

I beg to ask the questions…

  • Why do humans, for some reason in this era of more information than has even been available to a single person and the world, believe they can somehow change the Laws of the Universe, now, at this point in time?
  • Why do humans believe complicated scientific theories or explanations can somehow alter the basic Laws of Physics?
  • Why do humans believe quick fixes and instant results can somehow be brought forward with a cheap product or a ‘secret’ process that contradicts the basic Laws of Psychology?
  • Why do humans believe quick riches and monetary gain can somehow be attracted or manifested overnight in ways that counteract the basic Laws of Economics?

At what point did the ability to sell millions of books or have millions of podcast listeners or have millions of video subscribers somehow create movements of people who think they can somehow outsmart the basic laws that have governed Earth for thousands, millions, or even billions or years?

It is simple really…

  • Time.
  • Attention.
  • Energy.
  • Feelings.

The people who make the most noise get the most attention, know how to exert their energy toward creating feelings that move people to focus on a certain amount of time to show the results they need or want to project to keep the attention, energy, feelings, and time of the people who can pay the most focus toward the cause in which is most profitable in the current cycle.

There is no secret to life or change or business or health or fitness or anything really… culture and society knows the best marketing campaign to provide the loudest message to provoke the right feelings at the right time from the right people to get what is best for them in that current moment in time.

Society and Culture is playing a game… and we are the losers.

The only real way to counteract the noise of the world is to regain your own Personal Power over three areas of yourself.

  • Mindset
  • Behaviors
  • Environment

There are three primary areas of life you will want to focus on the regain your Personal Power.

  • Business
  • Fitness
  • Family

IF you are willing to look at the 6 primary areas of your current daily routines, you can begin to Climb YOUR Mountain of Personal Power so you can live the life you want to live.

  • Mindset Outlets: Intellectual and Creativity
  • Progressive Behaviors: Forward Movement and Physical Exercitation
  • Environmental Support: Spiritual and Emotional Releases

To begin to take the first steps forward, it is important to Clear the Clutter.

  • Create the Awareness of what you are currently doing.
  • Begin to remove clutter and barriers that are obvious and distracting you from taking a positive step forward.
  • Organize and Prioritize the direction you want to go and the steps you want to take to get there.
  • Focus…
  1. Focus Forward on the top priority.
  2. Focus your Attention on the FIRST step forward.
  3. Remove the Clutter of distractions and FEAR…

Start moving FORWARD with the FIRST step toward the rest of your life…

Take the first step.

Repeat.

Repeat again.

Repeat again and again.

Repeat again and again and again.

Repeat again and again and again and again.

Do NOT quit MOVING FORWARD!

Give yourself a hand.

Give yourself some grace.

Give yourself a chance.

Give yourself the opportunity to learn and grow and discover a whole new world you didn’t even know was possible by simply moving in the direction you want to go and repeating the action until you find the next best step forward in the direction of your goals and dreams!

Always cheering for you,
Gary

I have had some people ask recently what I do and what coaching relationship with me is like. Here is a quick synopsis. If you or anyone you know might be interested, please feel free to schedule a time that is convenient for you. I would love to find out more about you and see how I can add value to your life.

The basics:
I focus on mindset, behavior, and environmental modifications in business, fitness, and life. This is a fancy way of saying, we chat for an hour a week over the phone and we set goals, develop an action plan, and troubleshoot as we go to make sure we build consistent forward progress.

The calls have 3 main areas:
Sunshine- What’s going well
Sunset- What’s not going so well
Sunrise- How we can move forward in a positive direction

https://coachgary.as.me/tackaction

Can’t wait to chat!